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Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps - Stop Thinking, Start Drinking lyrics

When the pubs are shut
And the taxi queue is long
When your brain is mashed
And your legs are working wrong

When you haven't pulled
Or even if you have
When you've been to Abdul's
And he's spat on your kebab

Stop thinking, start drinking
Don't worry what your parents said
Fill your mind with beer instead
Stop thinking, start drinking
Don't worry what your doctors say
Your liver's ruined anyway

When you've all been out
And you've met the one you love
But your bottles gone
And you might not get it up

If you're insecure
That you might not be enough
Get some alcopops
And show the world your muff

Stop thinking, start drinking
Don't worry about the health warnings
Think about it in the morning
Stop thinking, start drinking
If you think your head's in trouble
Have some more, you'll see it double

Stop thinking and start drinking

Stop thinking, start drinking

Stop your thinking, please, start drinking
Stop your thinking and start drinking

Stop thinking, start drinking
If you're scared you've had too much
You need some courage from the Dutch

Stop thinking, start drinking
Yeah, yeah, yeah!