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Tom Lehrer - The Wiener Schnitzel Waltz lyrics

Spoken live introduction on Revisited:
Now to continue with the love song, here we have the
Viennese waltz type of the Franz Lehár/Johann Strauss
School, conjuring up images of gaily waltzing couples
And probably stale champagne drunk from sweaty slippers.
This example is called "The Wiener Schnitzel Waltz."

Do you remember the night I held you so tight
As we danced to the Wiener Schnitzel Waltz?
The music was gay, and the setting was Viennese
Your hair wore some roses (or perhaps they were peonies)
I was blind to your obvious faults
As we danced 'cross the scene
To the strains of the Wiener Schnitzel Waltz

Oh, I drank some champagne from your shoe, la l-la
I was drunk by the time I got through, la l-la
For I didn't know as I raised that cup
It had taken two bottles to fill the thing up

It was I who stepped on your dress, la l-la
The skirts all came off, I confess, la l-la
Revealing for all of the others to see
Just what it was that endeared you to me . . .

I remember the night I held you so tight
As we danced to the Wiener Schnitzel Waltz
Your lips were like wine (if you'll pardon the simile)
The music was lovely and quite Rudolf Frimly
I drank wine, you drank chocolate malts
And we both turned quite green
To the strains of the Wiener Schnitzel Waltz