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Tiger Magic - Insignificance lyrics

empty days. meaninglessness. silence. quietness.
I feel torn inside. void.
thoughtless existence
thoughtless (car)driving
lost in thoughts
(can’t remember the past seconds)
direct it against a wall
automatically
without wanting
just doing it
not for dying
only to get a leg broken or both
impact.
and the (e)motion picture in my head is over…

thoughtless bathing
staring at the white naked ceiling
slitting the wrists
obviously wrong
water red
am I dead?! no.
calling the ambulance
opening the apartment door
hoping help comes not too late

faint. I. floor.
pool of blood. naked.
blurred view.
awakening. a room filled with sold out seats.
strangers staring at me while I’m almost dying.
a tub of clear water.
and the (e)motion picture in my head is over…

standing on a bridge
wind is blowing across my face
the railing keeps me (staying) alive
but I let go and fall down to escape
the feeling of weightlessness makes me happy
I start smiling
closed eyes every single second
to feel the whole immensity of this infinity
knowing the ground is too close to vanish
I lose the awareness to be aware
crash of my own life
and the (e)motion picture in my head is over…

I’m afraid of my thoughts
what is happening to me?!
thoughtless thinking
but what’s the point?
I wanna live
really want it
love the life
I’m torn inside
I want back everything I’ve lost
and finally the (e)motion picture in my head is
over…
and I can start living again