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S.J. Tucker - Alligator In The House lyrics

There's an alligator in the house
A toothy grin appears beneath my chair
A scaly tail goes sliding out of sight
Now it's gone - was it ever there?
Something odd has moved into the house
Reptilian tracks lead underneath our bed
And all the cats are tasty, fat, and scared
Though I doubt we've lost any yet

So what's the big deal? Doesn't everyone
Have an alligator somewhere, somehow?
And maybe this one has always been here,
But I never noticed it till now.

There's an alligator in the house
Just caught her napping in the living room
She was dozing on the velvet couch
And the cats were sleeping there too
There's an alligator in the house
No one seems to mind except for me
Well, at least she doesn't eat the cats
I suspect she'd rather eat me

There's an alligator in the pit
She is dancing wildly with the snakes
To win them over to her cause
She will do whatever it takes
They think I don't see their little smiles
As they plan a reptilian overthrow
But I hear them talking in my dreams
They will not be sad to see me go!

So what's the big deal? Doesn't everyone
Have an alligator somewhere, somehow?
And maybe this one has always been here,
But I never noticed it till now.

I've begun to worry 'bout my toes
The alligator seems to think they're nice
I've counted all of them a hundred times
But I never got the same answer twice

There's an alligator in my bed
She is not a master of disguise
Just a pillow waiting for my head
Soft and sweet and hungrily she lies

There's an alligator in the house
Today she joined me for a spot of tea
She helped herself to raspberries and cream
And she didn't leave any for me

Well I thought that I had seen it all
But this alligator proved me wrong
Like a lady as she drank her tea
She sang to me this little song:

"so what's the big deal, doesn't everyone
Have an alligator somewhere somehow?
I know you'd miss me if I went away
Though you never noticed until now!"

So what's the big deal? Doesn't everyone
Have an alligator somewhere, somehow?
And maybe this one has always been here,
But I never noticed it till now.