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Half Man Half Biscuit - Petty Sessions lyrics

I stick me big nose in
When I go out
Sealed-off car park
What's it all about?
I like an altercation with a member of staff
"That was a ten pound note!"

I ring up Dial-A-Pizza
I ring up Dial-A-Pizza
I ring up Dial-A-Pizza
And say that's not how I would spell "Hawaiian"

Facebook Mum
YouTube Dad
Sea Bass Man Bag
Fifty quid to Chad
Would the congregation like to rise and sing
Hymn number 252

Here come the Barmy Army
They're absolutely crazy
Bart, Elvis and the baby
Kill kill kill stab murder and despatch