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Frank Zappa - Montana (Whipping Floss) lyrics

Guy in the audience: "Whipping Post"!
FZ: Say that again please!
Guy in the audience: "Whipping Post"!
FZ: "Whipping Post"? Ok, just a second... (Do you know that?) Oh sorry, we don't know that one. Anything else? Hum me a few bars of it, please, just show me how it goes, please. Just sing, sing me "Whipping Post" and then maybe we'll play it with you.
Guy in the audience: Ooh-ooh-ooh...
FZ: Thank you very much. And now... Judging from the way you sang it, it must be a John Cage composition, right? Here we go, "Montana". One two, one two three four...

I might be movin' to...

FZ: Hold it! Hold it! We can't possibly start the song off like that! Good God! That's inexcusable! What happened to you last night?
Napoleon: George has a tape of it...
FZ: George has a tape of it? Ok, we'll use that in the second show... Ready? "Montana"... Wait a minute, "Whipping Post"... No, "Montana". One two, one two three four...

FZ: It's too fast for you? One two, one two three four...

I might be movin' to Helsinki soon
Just to raise me up a crop of
Dental Floss

Raisin' it up
Waxen it down
Tying it to the Whipping Post
In the middle of town

But by myself I wouldn't
Have no boss,
'Cause I'd be raisin' my lonely
Whipping Post

Raisin' my lonely
Whipping Post
Raisin' my lonely
Whipping Post

Well I just might grow me some thongs
But I'd leave the heavy stuff
To somebody else... how 'bout Chester?
And then I would

Get a person
Tie him up
To the Whipping Post
And beat the living shit out of him
So that guy in the audience was satisfied

But by myself I wouldn't
Have no boss,
'Cause I'd be raisin' my lonely
Whipping Post Floss

Movin' to Montana soon (well...)
Gonna be a Dental Floss tycoon (how unique!)
(Whip! Whip!)
Movin' to Montana soon (now...)
Gonna be a mennil-toss flykune
(Yes, it's such a ballad at this tempo)

Napoleon: Little Booger-bear... Boogers everywhere...
FZ: And now for the thrilling conclusion of that song...