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Brian O'Halloran - Social Event Of The Season lyrics

Brian O'Halloran as Dante Hicks:
Aw, I'm going to go to her wake.

Jeff Anderson as Randal Graves:
No, you're not.

Brian O'Halloran as Dante Hicks:
Why not?

Jeff Anderson as Randal Graves:
It's today.

Brian O'Halloran as Dante Hicks:
What?

Jeff Anderson as Randal Graves:
Paulsen's Funeral Parlor. The next show is at four.

Brian O'Halloran as Dante Hicks:
Shit. What about tomorrow?

Jeff Anderson as Randal Graves:
One night only. She's buried in the morning.

Brian O'Halloran as Dante Hicks:
Aw, you've gotta watch the store. I gotta go to this.

Jeff Anderson as Randal Graves:
Wait, wait, wait, wait. Has it ever occurred to you that I might bereaved as well?

Brian O'Halloran as Dante Hicks:
You hardly knew her!

Jeff Anderson as Randal Graves:
True, but do you know how many people are going to be there? All of our old classmates, to say the least.

Brian O'Halloran as Dante Hicks:
Oh, stop it. This is beneath even you.

Jeff Anderson as Randal Graves:
I'm not gonna miss what's probably going to be the social event of the season.

Brian O'Halloran as Dante Hicks:
You hate people!

Jeff Anderson as Randal Graves:
But I love gatherings. Isn't it ironic?